Community Corner

Moms Council: Limiting Screen Time

This week's question: How do you limit your children's screen time?

Our this week tackles a issue that's hard to do in these connected, busy times:

How do you limit your children's screen time, with TV, Internet, handheld gaming devices and more?

Lisa Williams:

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Limiting the kids' screen time can be extremely difficult. We have a set time limit for screen time in our house.  The problem is that as soon as I turn my back, take a phone call, deal with an argument between the other kids or feed the dog, for example, the time limit tends to go out the window.  In other words, if I don't actively monitor the screen time, basically by physically being there, the kids will try to sneak a few more minutes on the computer or their DSI, etc.  This does makes sense, though, because they're kids, and most kids want to push the boundaries as much as they can.  I know I was the same way when I was young. 

I find that the management of screen time tends to be more of an issue during the weekends when there are bigger chunks of time spent at home.  So my goal is to try to keep the kids busy and active - taking them to the movies, to an event or to participate in a special activity, for example.  This ends up being a great way to limit their screen time plus the outings are fun for the whole family.

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Erin Patterson:

My daughters are 2 and 4, and if I allowed them to watch television every waking hour of the day, they absolutely would.  They are preschool age, so their screen time is really restricted to television.  They don't have hand-held devices (they're too young!) nor computer time yet.  In our home, I limit television time to late afternoon.  Despite the fact that my 2 year old asks every morning over breakfast, "Can I watch a show?" the answer is never different - it's always no.  Breakfast is the only meal we eat as a family, so the TV is off.  I am occasionally guilty of turning on the TV in the kitchen to catch the news headlines or check the weather, but I try to make sure it's off when the girls come downstairs to eat. 

After school and afternoon activities, my girls need down time.  Sure, they could color or find another quiet activity, but they like TV and while they unwind with a movie or a show, I am able to get dinner started or fold a load or 2 of laundry.  Quite frankly, an hour of TV time for the girls is mutually beneficial!  I limit TV time to 30-60 minutes during the week and I'm a bit more flexible on the weekends.

Heather Stephens:

This is such a timely question for our family as it is something we have been struggling with recently.   My son has become a 6-year-old electronic junkie.  The Nintendo DSi, Wii, my iPad, you name it, he wants to play it.  Constantly.   He even knows how to use the apps on my smart phone better than I do!   As soon as I take away one “screen” he is begging for another one.  The conversation goes a little like this as soon he gets off the bus.  “Can I play with my DS?”  “No. Not till 4:30”.   Five minutes later…  “Is it 4:30 yet?”  (It’s going to be a long 2 hours!)   For now, we have decided that during the week, the kids get about an hour and a half a day of screen time.   They can decide how to spend it.  The choices are their DSi, TV or Wii.  I will say, as much as I don’t like the video games, I feel like at least they are thinking and interacting, versus zoning out on the sofa.  

In the meantime, I try to fill up the non-screen time with activities that will exercise their imagination.   I feel a child’s imagination is an amazing gift that fades as they age, and all of the electronic devices that kids play with today weaken their ability to play imaginatively.  So I encourage my two youngest to create their own make believe world.  I plant the seed, and then they take off with it.  When the pieces click into place, the two of them will be Meerkats in the desert making burrows, dinosaur explorers dodging volcano lava, or most recently teenaged rock stars in their own band.  These games are so fun to facilitate and can last for hours.   And best of all… no batteries are required!

Linda Johnson:

The electronic monster is alive, well, and flourishing in our house!  The television is the biggest draw for my two daughters (11 & 5), while computer games and the DS rank supreme with my son (9).  What started off as a nice way to get dinner going with some level of peace has slowly evolved into a battle of "just 5 more minutes" or "can I just see the end?".  I'm so over the word "just".  Slowly but surely, I am  redirecting their time during the school week towards non-electronic activities, with some assistance from:

Homework First:  yes, this is as popular with my kids as you'd think.

The Show List:  each of my children has a small list of shows that he/she likes and has permission to watch.  If the show isn't on, then neither should the TV.

Time Limit: No electronics after dinner, at all.  I try to limit it to 45 minutes a day, and that's cumulative time for ALL electronics: TV, email, Internet games.  If it's a few minutes past that point, I'll ask for things to be closed down.  Not sure if that's ever happened.  I used to ask and ask and ask, hoping they would become miraculously responsible and grateful that I've allowed them this privilege.  I now simply walk into the room and turn off/take away/log out without saying a word.  This, they understand.

Handhelds in Motion:  The Weston Public schools offer my children a fantastic education.  The bus ride offers an alternative education that I'd rather my kids skipped.  So, when the bus is actually caught I do allow my son to take his DS with him.  He's solely accountable for it, and that responsibility is working:  it's still in his possession after 6 months!  If he could only attach the same significance to his ski gloves (last count 3 pair gone).  Plus this has cut down on the phone calls from the school (kidding).  And if a car ride will take 2 hours or more, then the DS, Leapster, Didj and cell phone games can come along for the ride.

Flexibility:  Probably my greatest friend.  Occasionally surprising my kids with an extra 30 minutes of screen time garners me HUGE kudos.  Sometimes it's because I know they've worked really hard on something in school, had a bad day, or have done something extraordinarily kind.  And sometimes it isn't for anything.  The unexpected keeps them slightly aware that it's a privilege ... and the extra time is sometimes what's needed to keep me sane that day.  Win-win.

On the week-ends I'm definitely more lax with their screen time allowance but not overly so.  We try and do a family movie night a couple of times a month which the kids - for now - still view as a treat.  Nice!



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